Icon-o-clash 3: The "Real-World" Edition

The Fable of the Giraffe and the Bear
Once upon a time, a giraffe named Jerome was running through the forest, trying to get to the Friendly Giant's castle before Rusty ate all the cookies. Suddenly, he was stopped by a bear wearing a very official looking hat.
"Dude, did you eat a Forest Ranger?" Jerome asked.
The bear did not look amused, "Do you know how fast you were going just now? I had you clocked at 30, on a trail clearly marked for WALKING. What's the rush buster?"
"Uhhh. Well, I needed to get to that castle over there-"
"You know the owner of that castle? Interesting. I've had that place under surveillance for weeks," the Bear said. "Very quiet, except for that weird flute music, and lots of smoke pouring out the chimneys. Classic signs of a grow-op."
Jerome was confused. "A what? Look man, come with me, the giant will straighten all this out. He's got a nice rocking chair you can sit in next to the fire."
"FIRE?" the bear exclaimed. "I've got no time for fires. My name's Smokey, and what I always say is-"
"Dude, your name's Smokey? And you're against fires? And pot? I think you're a little conflicted."